Intimacy is about brain states. It's neurophysiological, as relationships amplify cortisol, provide a unique pathway to healing the past, and offer the opportunity for rapture that nothing else can.

That's not what I learned when I went to marriage counseling. Based on the brain, relationships are the most challenging thing to do, and based on my personal experience and the brain-based approach to health, they are a lot easier than one might think.

Right now, we are just launching a new app, a suite of new tools on member home pages, and two books. You'd think the last thing we would do is offer a New Brain Based Couples Training course, but how could we not?

Again, relationships – and resetting them, upgrading our own approach to relationships, and finding more satisfaction with emotional connection, sexual pleasure, and loving companionship – can reset our health and happiness.

Take tonight for instance. Walt and I were in completely different brain states, with different stress loads in our brains. I'm in the middle of dealing with some significant physical pain, processing a series of three huge family events (that are complicated), preparing to deliver a major talk, and processing the pain of the passing of a cherished friend. There is really no need to give reasons for my stress, as the brain does what it does!

I'm stressed, but Walt is on a well-deserved natural high. He's a person that is all about nature, and he just went on a bike ride, and is soaking in the beauty of nature in summer. Today he connected with both his kids, and as he just went to his college reunion and reunited with old friend, he is in his glow.

I am at FIVE and he is at ONE.


This was a set up for us to merge or distance, deadening our passion and fun. We don't go down that road. We use brain-based health, and it's pretty easy. We used the relationship reset tools of EBT, and this evening, we are both happier.

I said to Walt, "How do people live without these tools?"

He said, "They may not."

And that's the overall concept of brain based health. We need love, and it's hard! It's not easy! If we have a system for figuring out what to do in all five of the brain states (our own and our partner or spouse's) it's a lot easier. We are less likely to have that stress go into creating health problems (anxiety, depression, weight gain, excesses and more). The tools are really simple, highly effective and give us confidence to charge forward in relationships, knowing the drill – it's a brain thing!

We are piloting the Brain Based Couples Training, a short course in the core tools of intimacy. To participate, both people in a committed relationship must participate, and they will be in separate groups, as the emphasis is on each person acquiring the tools. It's a six-week program, once weekly for to minutes. The cost is $159/month per person for two months.

If you would like more information, please contact and request information on Brain Based Training for Couples.

BBH Couples Solution GroupThink differently about intimacy and energy the new time of brain-based couples programs. In challenging committed relationships, a skills reset is needed and a fresh perspective on the brain-based causes of relationship issues. Learn how to be separate but close with your partner or spouse, to give unconditional love and set all the  limits needed. Learn how to have an exceptionally productive fight and how to reneocviate emotional connection, sexual pleasure and loving companionship. CRITERIA: In a committed relationship (spouse or partner)

Starts: September 10

Ends: October 15

Weekly session: 5:00 p.m. to 5:45 p.m. Pacific Time

Provider: Laurel Mellin, PhD Fee: $199 to enroll, and $199 four weeks later.

To enroll: Contact Michael McClure -